I haven't been feeling the greatest lately. I struggle to get out of bed everyday to do something other than take care of Zoey. I love Zoey and I try my best to take care of her, but I've had trouble adapting to doing just that. Part of it I know is I needed time to recover. I needed time to readjust to this new role that has been brought into my life. So as I'm feeling sluggish and moping around the apartment, slowly getting things done, I try to motivate myself to get things done in small steps. Small steps as in OK today I am going to do laundry, get dishes done for the day, and whatever small things I see that might not seem too overwhelming.
Tonight... after I had got out of bed at 8AM and STAYED out of BED all day, GOT out of the apartment AND stayed out of the apartment til 5PM! I'm trying to remember the last time I was out of the apartment for that long. Anyway I walk into the kitchen for the first time today and look around to find my kitchen is not a mess :) It's not perfect, but it is no where near the disaster that it was..
I begin to find hope that I am headed in a better direction, that I can control and take charge of my life. To find peace in knowing things will get done over time. That I might find joy in these small things (other than Zoey, as she is so small still :) )
And that my friends is my tiny victory for the week... and it's only Wednesday :) Maybe there is hope after all!
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That's exactly how it happens...little by little you find yourself able to do more, be about more, get out a little more until one day you have 2 little rugrats clinging to your legs and you wonder what happened to your life but they are just so cute that you can't help but smile about the changes!
ReplyDeleteYeah it's getting easier.. not as easy as I'd like but then again when is taking care of someone else ever super easy?
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